Winding Road
by stormseaker
Summary: Ash almost looses more than just the competition at the Indigo league. There is something strange going on, but Ash is busy struggling to keep his dream alive and prove to everyone he can be the best. AU Orange Islands. No romance.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter One

Friends Again

...

After the show at the Indigo Plateau Charizard relaxed in his pokeball, satisfied that he'd gotten his message across to Ash. Charizard wasn't going to obey, not even when it meant costing Ash an important battle. That should wipe that smug look from the boy's face.

When he heard his name Charizard stirred, wanting to hear the aftermath of refusing to obey his trainer.

'-izard! I won't let you take him!' What? Was team rocket after him this time? That could be fun, it was always satisfying to see them go flying.

'Ash, your charizard obviously won't obey you. It would be best if it is rehomed with someone who can control him, before someone gets hurt.' That wasn't any of the team rocket people, it didn't sound like anyone Charizard knew. Him, controlled? They'd have a better chance of controlling a forest fire!

…but what was this about being rehomed?

Charizard could feel Ash pick his pokeball from his belt, the little machine warming up ready to release him. Was this it? After months of waiting?

'Please! Give me another chance!' Was…was the boy fighting to keep him? Charizard felt a creeping sensation of something and quickly squashed it. No. He couldn't want to keep a disobedient pokemon on his team. He was probably just pretending.

'That is enough. You have had your warnings. You will either hand over the pokemon or we will suspend your licence.' The creep collapsed into disappointment. Ash wouldn't give up being a trainer. Not for Charizard. He'd been waiting to be abandoned, and now he would be.

'No! you're right, I haven't trained as hard as I could have. But I can do it, I can be a better trainer for my charizard!'

…What?

He was still refusing to back down? After all the trouble Charizard had caused him? After all the flamethrowers, throwing his chance at winning the league?

'Ash, part of being a good trainer is knowing when you are beaten. You should do as the league representative says.' Charizard scoffed. Ash never knew when he was beaten. He never gave up. Not even on a charizard that wouldn't listen. (being called out again and again, spitting fire in Ash's face again and again.)

'Brock!'

'I'm serious Ash. Enough.' Even Ash's flock-mates were arguing for him to give up. Charizard stated to feel something new. Worry.

'No! Look, it was a mistake to send out Charizard, but it was just one mistake! And, and no one got hurt! All that happened was I lost a battle.' Ash's voice sounded oddly wet.

'Ash, every time you let him out he attacks you!' That was the water girl, Misty. Never liked her (soft hands feeding him treats…)

'Yeah, me! I can take it. He's never hurt anyone else! Look!'

And one very confused charizard found himself being released from his pokeball. On automatic, he roared and blasted a flamethrower into the sky, feeling himself calm with it. It was dark now, and he was standing in the street by the stadium, lit by some of the metal light-trees. His flamethrower was taller twice over, he saw with satisfaction. Charizard stomped and looked for Ash's reaction.

Ash wasn't even looking at him! Instead he was crying. His head down and shadowed. He was cringing away from him, Charizard realised with a shock. Ash had never flinched from him before!

Professor Oak, Misty and Brock were standing opposite Ash on the darkened street. They had a handful of strangers in fancy looking clothes with them. Charizard guessed this must be the league representatives that Brock had mentioned. These were the people demanding Ash surrender him. Charizard snorted, and the groups as a whole took a step back. They were afraid. Of him. Next to Charizard Ash was sobbing hard enough to make his shoulders shake.

'See!' Said one of the strange men, waving his hand towards the embers floating in the air and Charizard. What? It wasn't like he had torched anyone, not even Ash!

'It is for the best young man,' said another, more soft spoken one 'your charizard would benefit more from an experienced trainer.' But Ash didn't move to hand over his pokeball, instead he hugged it to his chest and curled around it. Shaking.

Charizard starts to growl without meaning to. Pikachu had had enough too, and let loose a thunderbolt that stuck the street in front of the strangers and cracked the stone. They all jumped, a satisfying amount of fear on their faces. Now they would back down in the face of their strength!

But the first league man quickly recovered from the fear, looking somehow triumphant. Like someone had just walked into his flamethrower.

'Oak, I told you I wasn't sure about this boys team. That Pikachu is already too powerful, what happens when it evolves and stops listening to the boy? It could kill someone with attacks like that. I think we need to review his whole team.'

Ash's head jerked up, horrified, his eyes begging and face wet. Professor Oak glared at the stranger, but Ash's companions said nothing. They looked away.

Charizard felt any remains of his self-riochous rage disperse. Separate Ash and Pikachu? That was just.. wrong!

Charizard turned to Ash and bent to look the boy in the face. He is sobbing like his heart was breaking, face wet and dripping. Charizard hadn't wanted this.

He wasn't sure what he had wanted. But this wasn't it. The stranger stepped towards Ash, reaching for his pokeball and the fire pokemon snapped his fangs at him. Hands off! Immediately someone released a blastoise that stomped and growled and tried to intimidate Charizard.

He just snorted at her, and stepped closer to Ash completely dwarfing the young boy. Ash looked up, tearful and terrified and so very very young. Charizard looked at him and felt ashamed.

This was the same boy who had helped save him after he'd been abandoned. (He'd whispered sorry over and over, had cried, had promised he'd do better if Damien would just give him a chance!) Ash had run into a storm for him, before he even knew him. How had he forgotten? The memory seemed distant and foggy, but he remembered warm hands and worried eyes, a jacket tented over his tail. Keeping him alive.

And he had turned around and abandoned that boy. The person who had pulled him out of the cold and given him a home and a team.

Charizard breathes in deep, and Ash flinches. Charizard's heart sinks, and he blows out as gently as he can drying his boys face. Ash gulps down his tears and looks up at his pokemon standing above him with wide sad eyes.

Charizard rumbles gently at him, and it's like dawn break. For the first time in months Ash can see his friend plainly, not hidden behind contempt and anger. The boy throws his arms around the dragon, clinging like a Mankey and sobs all the harder.

'I'm so sorry Charizard, I'm so sorry.' The pokemon rumbles gently again, guilt filling him and the trainer, his friend, apologises desperately. (come back Damian, I'm sorry)

The night is cold, and Ash is warm against him, except for the place where his face is dripping all over him. That's the reason why Charizard stand there and doesn't pull back. Maybe even curls an arm around Ash. The other humans are still watching. They all look a bit sad, although the leader looks frustrated. Charizard wishes he could tell them all to buzz off.

Ash steps back to smile at Charizard, and the lead stranger clears his throat in the silly awkward way humans do when they want attention. Why couldn't they roar like a normal mon? Ash jumps and looks at him.

'Look, Ash, a hug doesn't change anything. You just aren't ready for a pokemon like charizard.' Charizard bends his head over Ash's shoulder and, knowing all about annoying people, yawns in the man's face, before draping himself over Ash. It wasn't comfortable, Ash's bony shoulder was digging into his neck and the boy was really too short (when had the boy gotten so small?) but it got the message across.

I don't care what you have to say. I'm not going anywhere.

Ash stands tall with his pokemon leaning on him and looks the lead stranger in the eye, radiating determination, rather than fear or sadness. Charizard feels Pikachu climb over him to get to his usual spot on Ash's shoulder, and sees the mouse grinning at him. It's been a while since any of his team mates had looked happy to see him. Ash's hand comes up and smooths down his neck and Charizard feels as tall as a mountain.

'Maybe I'm not ready right now. But I can learn. I won't just let you take any of my team from me.' Charizard huffs in agreement, blowing smoke towards the stranger who coughs and scowls at them.

Ash keeps going 'It was stupid to use Charizard in that match. But that is one mistake. No one got hurt' and he pauses. Charizard carefully doesn't think of the tantrums he'd thrown over the last few weeks, power itching to get out, rage in his belly and fire in his head. 'And no one will. I'll train hard and work with Charizard so that we can battle together. We can't do that if you take him away.'

The strange man takes in Ash's 'you can't make me' face, Charizard draped over him like a lazy Persian and turns to the other humans. Someone murmurs 'It hardly looks out of control now' and the man gives in with a huff.

'You are going to be on our watch list, young man. If you don't improve than we will revoke your licence and rehome your pokemon. Is that understood?'

Charizard huffs and returns himself to his pokeball. His mind is troubled and his skin is itching from all the emotions he's had to deal with today. But he sure of one thing. Ash would never let that happen.

...

AN

Rewritten to fit a longer story in the works.

Stay tuned to see Ash to take things seriously, deal with the trauma of almost having his whole dream taken from him, and forge friendships along the way.


	2. Friends and an End

Ash is having a bad day. He's lost the league, almost lost his licence, and his friends aren't helping. It's a good thing he has his pokemon, and even Charizard is back on board!

…..

Chapter Two

Friends, and an End

…

Ash can't believe how badly today has gone

When the league representatives had approached Ash after the match and told him that they were going to rehome Charizard Ash had laughed. 'No!' He'd said, looking to Brock and Misty to back him up. There was no way he'd hand over Charizard! And then the head of the team had thanked Brock for his report. Brock had winced, and Ash felt his heart fracture.

As a gym leader Brock was obliged to inform the league of any pokemon he thought where being abused, or neglected, or posed a danger. Fine.

But Ash couldn't believe that he'd contacted the league without even talking to him about it!

He stood with his ears ringing before the group of officials, and just could not believe it. His friends wouldn't do this to him!

Then the impossible had happened (his friendly Charmander was back!) and the league representatives left him with a warning. Ash turned to Brock and Misty expecting something like a sorry, or an explanation that there had been a misunderstanding. Only to be faced with a '_we told you_', '_what did you expect?',_ and warnings that he'd not get off so lightly next time, that he should be glad nothing happened.

Lightly?! They'd almost taken his pokemon from him! Professor Oak nodded sadly and explained how a good chunk of the pokemon at the ranch came from such seizures, although, he added with a scowl, he'd never heard of one being done in such a hasty manner, as the league usually took weeks to follow up on _his_ reports.

Ash just looked at them, completely gutted and disbelieving. Misty and Brock shared an uncomfortable look, and made noises about heading back to the pokemon centre for the night. Ash just kept staring.

When Misty started to make a comment about being a cry baby Ash turned and left them standing there in the street. They called after him, but the pounding in his ears muffled it. He felt like something was twisting and bleeding in his chest making it hard to breathe. He didn't return to the pokemon centre, and instead headed out of town into the comfort of the trees and moon-lit darkness.

Marching along, feeling too wobbly to run, Ash thinks at them_, I expected you to be my friends!_ He'd come inches from victory today. Only to fail miserably, and then come inches from having his whole team taken and his licence pulled!

_That is not nothing!_

It's starting to sink in just what might have happened tonight, and he ploughs onward through low scrub. He's panting like he's been running, and it takes a while to realise that Pikachu is calling to him and sparking where he clings to his back. Ash stumbles and stops and Pikachu crawls onto his shoulder to rub cheeks and coo. Ash sniffles, he feels like an over wrung rag, but tears are threatening again. His knees have turned to goo.

Ash sits down right where he is. He's surrounded by trees, the lights of the town a faint glimmer to his left and nothing more than nature and the stars and his best friend with him. Pikachu scrambles over his shoulder to cuddle and coo and emit worry and love to his face and Ash has to laugh a little. He's trying desperately not to start sobbing again.

He feels a bit like the time he fell down the stairs and broke his arm. Clammy and cold and miserable. He curls around Pikachu and presses his sticky face to his fur and tries to breathe like his mum had told him then.

Iiiiiiiinn….and…..ooooouuuuut…iiiiiiin…..and…ooooouuuuut

He swallows around his misery and whispers like he's confiding a secret.

'I really messed up, didn't I Pikachu?' Pikachu growls and rubs his cheek against Ash's' face, radiating 'no!no!loveyou' and it almost helps.

'They were going to take Charizard. They were going to take _all_ of you!' Pikachu 'chhaa'ed and squirmed to get at the pokeballs hanging from his belt, releasing his entire team in a burst of light.

Ash feels embarrassed and comforted all at once as his pokemon squirm for a prime spot to cuddle. He ducks his head but opens his arms, desperately wanting his team around him but wanting to hide the tears. _Cry baby._

Even Charizard was curling around him, rumbling softly. Pikachu flattened himself against his front, with Squirtle to his left sharing lap space with Bulbasaur. Pidgeotto pressed warm and soft against his right, beak resting on top of his head (was she ok? She must be so tired after today). Memories of a freezing night spent in a snowy cave stirred and Ash sniffed. They had all tried so _hard_. Even exhausted and beaten up they'd fought on and gotten them to the match and almost won it!

'I am so, so sorry that you all worked so hard for nothing.' His team cooed and growled and in their own way made their support known. It him feel like the most accomplished trainer ever, to have such a wonderful team.

Determination filled him as their love pushed down the hurt of what his friends had done.

'But this won't happen again. I'll take care of you. I'll do better.'

That was a promise. And Ash didn't break his promises.

…


	3. Pallet Party Blues

Feeling betrayed by his friends, Ash returns to Pallet Town, depressed and directionless. Can he pull himself out of this funk?

...

Chapter Three

Pallet Party Blues

…

While he knew his mum meant well, this whole party was an exercise in horrible awkwardness. Except Ash seemed to be the only one feeling it. He made a little speech, praising the hard work of his pokemon. He was sincere in thanking everyone who had supported him, but bit back the thought that the support had been offered under undeclared conditions.

His neighbours all came forward to congratulate him and shake his hand. His mum was beaming and boasting about what an accomplishment he'd made, getting to the top sixteen after not even a year of being a trainer, but all Ash could think of was the group of officials and friends standing opposite him on a darkened street demanding he hand over his team. He smiled and thanked them all anyway.

The crowd clears out, gravitating towards the free food, leaving just his mum and Misty and Brock. He'd been dodging any serious conversation with Brock or Misty the whole way back to Pallet. Mostly by setting his mother and professor Oak between them and nodding along to their lighter conversations. Laughing and smiling while wanting to yell at them. It had been exhausting.

Ash released his team to join in (and make a distraction). There was a not so little part of him satisfied to see them eye Charizard warily. But the giant lizard merely snorted before turning to the tables groaning under the weight of the food gathered on top of them, happy for the opportunity to pig out.

Ash ducked away, heading for the safety offered by the blaring radio. Ha! Couldn't talk if they couldn't hear him. Mimey was hurrying around, collecting rubbish and offering drinks to anyone that happened to be empty handed. Ash grinned, seeing Squirtle grab the nervous pokemon and pull him into a game of chase with the others.

The radio only provided a small cover though, and Ash quickly got bored of standing there listening to the country rock his mum loved. In-between songs he volunteered to go get more food from the caterers, ordering more than enough to feed everyone.

Ash was almost glad of the interference of Team Rocket, and Brocks face upon biting one of the super spicy meat balls was hilarious. Well worth his own burning mouth. It was extremely satisfying to see Team Rocket sent flying by one of Charizard's awesome flamethrowers, and he shared a celebratory fist bump with his smug fire-type before returning him.

The destruction of the party tables was a wonderful excuse to wrap up the party and head home for the day. Ash dodged everyone by yawning loudly, and shut himself in his room.

Ha, he thought, talk to the door cause Ash ain't listening. He let his shoulders slump and relax. Pikachu jumped onto the bed and curled up for a nap.

He took in the unchanged walls of his room, the dust free blankets, and the smell of fresh detergent coming off the bed sheets and sighed. The quiet of his bedroom didn't feel comfortable somehow. And now he mostly felt tired of being angry. It didn't come easy to Ash to hold a grudge, but the hurt was hardly easy to handle either.

It was, strange, being back in his room after seeing so much of the world. He felt both big and small. There were the familiar posters, and the selves full of pokemon models and magazines. But they appeared as caricatures. Matching and not to his memories. It's still his room, and it feels safe. But in the same way his mums kitchen feels safe. As if he is welcome here, but doesn't belong.

He isn't at all tired like he told everyone, it's only mid-afternoon. But Ash doesn't want to make too much noise in case that encourages someone to come in and talk to him. So he pulls an old magazine from a self and flips it open. All the while thinking 'what now, what now, what now?'.

Ash has no idea where to go from here. He feels directionless and adrift and vaguely guilty. He was meant to be a trainer, offering support and guiding his pokemon to be the best and Ash couldn't even picture the next step forward.

Except for the fact he wasn't keen on taking those steps with Brock or Misty.

Ash squints at the print, the words doing their usual thing and jumping all over the place making it impossible to focus. He tries bracketing each and every word with his thumbs like usual, but reading like that is like reading a telegraph. The stops make the overall message loose meaning and Ash quickly gives up and flops down on the bed next to a snoozing Pikachu. Now he feels even more frustrated and useless. He strokes Pikachu's ears gently and sighs.

'What now buddy?' Pikachu doesn't stir. Ash wishes he could fall asleep at the drop of a hat like his friend, but he's already twitching to get up and do something. But what?

His mum calls him downstairs with a message to meet Professor Oak at his lab. Ash hurries off before Brock or Misty can volunteer to come with him.

It's a lovely day, sun shining and the weather mild. The walk to the lab is calm and quiet, and Ash jogs to hurry it up.

The Professor greets him with a wide smile and calls him into the back of the study where he introduces the problem. He asks Ash to go to the Orange Islands to retrieve a mysterious pokeball that can't be transported like a normal pokeball.

It's interesting and just what he wants, something to do. And maybe it's an apology and a peace offering from the professor. He has a soft sad look to him while asking Ash to help him. Ash can't find it in him to keep being angry at him for his part in trying to confiscate Charizard. He knows Professor Oak loves pokemon as much as Ash does, and only ever wants the best for all of them. His lack of faith in Ash being able to give his pokemon the best hurt, but it only makes him want to earn that confidence from the man even more. So he says yes, of course, I'll go get the pokeball for you.

He leaves with the map and directions to Professor Ivys' lab in hand, sure of his direction for the first time in days. He'll go get this ball and bring it back safely and show that he can be trusted. It would be a great opportunity to train and battle new people and pokemon!

He goes outside to check on all his stored pokemon and ends up running around with his herd of Tauros and having a fun time trying not to get thrown off as they chase the other pokemon around. He's glad to see them all looking so happy and healthy, their mood is infective and Ash finds himself grinning and laughing more than he has in days. Seeing them all together he figures that maybe that is why they all kept throwing themselves in the path of his safari balls – they wanted to be captured as a herd and stay together.

He can't fault them for that, even if he was disappointed that he hadn't been able to catch really interesting pokemon in the Safari Zone.

Then Ash finds himself fighting off a familiar Fearow, and Pidgeotto evolving. She was so beautiful, proud, and so strong, and it was all Ash could do to not cry (god he was sick of crying) as he released her to protect the pokemon around Pallet Town. Pikachu chaa'ed and rubbed his cheek against Ash's, just as sad and just as proud as his trainer.

He was glad that Misty wasn't there to see him cuddle Pidgeot for what might be the last time. She would have probably teased him horribly for it. Pidgeot looked like she belonged in a finale of a movie, leading the flock and flying off into the setting sun.

Ash scrubs his face on his shirt and turns homewards.

He goes home planning to leave once he says goodbye to his mum, and tiptoes around Misty and Brock who are sitting in the lounge watching a re-run of the highlights of the league completion. He winces away from the thought of it showing his flop in the semi-finals. Again. He finds his mum in the kitchen and explains professor Oaks request, and says he's leaving right away. She demands he stay the night, and starts fussing over his gear and making a list of things he will need to pack. Reluctantly he agrees to leave at first light. Travelling in the dark is dangerous after all.

He doesn't sleep well, and gets up as soon as the Dodrio caws. He hugs his mum tightly and says he'll see her soon. He doesn't see his friends, but he detours through the forest to tell Pigdeot goodbye, and ask her to check in with professor Oak every now and then.

Those first few steps out of town hit him with a sense of deja-vu, like his room, he feels too small and too big at the same time. He keeps walking, concentrating on the weight of Pikachu on his shoulder, the heat of the sun, and the sensation fades.

…..

AN.

Ok, to explain in case I was unclear (please tell me if it was unclear) Ash has dyslexia. And maybe ADHD. It's a headcanon of mine that I've had for years. He can read, but it's hard and takes more time than it's worth. He also has trouble reading maps and following written directions because of this.

This chapter is without dialogue, but it won't continue like that.

Also keep in mind that Ash is 10 and an unreliable narrator. What he thinks and feels isn't what everyone thinks or feels. Misty and Brock's aren't evil sods, I promise.


	4. All Aboard the Train

Ash sets off alone to fetch the mysterious pokeball for Professor Oak. He is determined to earn the professors trust, and be a better trainer. But where to start?

…

Chapter Four

All Aboard the Train

…

Traveling alone was lonely.

It was a silly, obvious, thing to think. But it was true. Ash hadn't travelled alone before, and the silence along route 21 seemed to echo.

Well, he wasn't actually alone. He brushed his hands along his belt feeling where his team hung, safe and resting. Pikachu was a warm weight sleeping on the top of his backpack.

But he'd always had a person to talk to before. And now all he had was his own thoughts, and they weren't happy ones. All he could seem to think of was how his friends didn't trust him to raise his team right. And that maybe they weren't wrong.

He obviously hadn't been doing a very good job of raising his pokemon. Charizard was the least of it. He'd gotten through to the top sixteen of the Indigo League, true. But not the finals. And some part of his brain whispered that it was more down to the inherent strength of his pokemon than any training he'd managed. His heart ached.

He'd dreamed of working side by side with pokemon for years. Dreamed of traveling together, fighting together, winning together. Of having people say 'well done', and being impressed and not dismissing him anymore. Finally give his mum something real to be proud of.

That hadn't happened.

His eleventh birthday was only three months away and he didn't feel any further along on his journey. He wasn't even sure where to start! It had seemed so simple when leaving Pallet Town for the first time. Get pokemon, get badges, win.

Looking down the long road to the peninsular he sighed. Everything seemed further away than ever.

He was tired, wary to the bone even though he'd only left Pallet Town yesterday. He hadn't slept well the last few days. He'd been having strange dreams again. _An impression of light and dark, a flash a violet and then his breathe seizes in his chest and his body _stops _and he starts to fall _and he wakes gasping for air.

He has no idea what it the dreams are about. But he'd been having them for the last two months or so. Usually he'd wake up and check on Pikachu, see Brock and Misty not far away, and roll back over. He hadn't been able to do that today. Instead he'd gotten to work boiling water and fixing breakfast for everyone, waking Pikachu as soon as he could justify it and releasing his group of sleepy pokemon for the company.

Ash sighed again, frustration building. He was sick of feeling uncertain about everything. About his dreams, about his journey, about his friends!

There wasn't much he could do about the dreams.

He could do something about the rest of it though. Ash made up his mind there and then to stop thinking so much about his friends lack of faith in him. He was going to prove them all wrong and show the whole world that he and his pokemon were the best!

'What do you say Pikachu?' His buddy cha'd sleepily.

'We're going to be the best ever!' That got him a much more enthusiastic cha, and Pikachu stretched up over his shoulder to rub their cheeks together. Ash grinned at him.

'Enough of this moping, right?' Pikachu cheered and Ash bounced along a few steps feeling himself get more pumped and the black mood lifting.

'What do they know really? We're just getting started! We haven't even touched our full potential yet!' Pikachu sparked and chattered, grinning and happy to see Ash's mood pick up for the first time in days.

'We'll show them. In fact!' Ash stopped in the middle of the road and grabbed his pokeballs, releasing his team. They all appeared, checked for Team Rocket and then turned their attention to Ash wondering why he'd pulled them all out at once in the middle of nowhere.

'Ok team! We are going to win this thing!' His pokemon looked around confused. What thing? Ash face faulted.

'Right. Sorry. I guess I got over excited.' Ash sighed, then puffed himself back up. No moping!

'When I say we are going to win this thing, I mean everything! You all worked super hard in the Indigo League, and we nearly won it! Next time, we _are_ going to win it!' His pokemon all roared their agreement, happy to understand what he was talking about and glad to see him pumped up again.

'We've got experience now, and we know what it's like in a big completion like that. And I know where we went wrong.' Here Ash paused, taking a deep breath. 'It was me. I was wrong. I'm why you lost.' His pokemon roared again, this time in dismay. Even Charizard was growling at him in disagreement.

'Guys, I'm sorry. I didn't take it seriously and if I had you would have swept the floor with those other pokemon! I've been slacking off, and neglecting you.' They all protested but Ash shook his head, standing firm.

'It's true! I promised all of you that we'd be the best.' Ash took in his team, their worried faces, and felt full of love.

'You guys are all the very best, and from now on I'll be working hard to be the very best for you too.' They all cheered quietly, wanting to agree but obviously worried about him, and Pikachu surprised him by biting his ear.

'Ow! Hey!' Pikachu growled at him, convinced that Ash was being too hard on himself.

'Look, what I'm trying to say is that from now on we will be doing more training. And, and I'll be doing whatever I can to learn more about being a better trainer for all of you.' His head of steam lost, Ash shrunk into himself a little.

'Although I have no idea where to start.' He surveyed his team, and grabbed his determination and held onto it with all he had. They deserved the best from him.

'From now on, if any of you feel like I'm being an idiot, or not working hard enough, you kick my butt ok?' His team exchanged looks, Ash was an idiot most of the time. A lovable, kind hearted and head strong idiot. Charizard, who'd been hanging back and acting aloof so far, rumbled and struck, snatching Ashs' hat off his head, holding it high above him. Cheeky and teasing.

'Hey! I'm being serious here!' Ash jumped for the hat, and Squirtle called a charge and leapt on top of him, quickly followed by Bulbasaur and a chittering Pikachu. Ash shouted and squirmed as they dog-piled on top of him, but quickly broke into laughter.

Ok. So maybe he was being too serious. But that didn't mean he wasn't telling the truth. He gasped for air under the weight of his pokemon and called for mercy. Satisfied that the funk had been broken, they rolled off him chattering with laughter and pleased with themselves. From down in the dirt, Ash looked up at them all with a wide grin.

'I am being serious guys. I promise you all. I'm going to do better. And you can all kick my butt if I break that promise ok?' His team cheered and Charizard rumbled before setting his hat back on his head, tugging it down over his face.

'Very funny Charizard.' His team chorused their agreement. It had been very funny! Ash took in his satisfied, happy team standing before him and felt sure that they were going to take the world by storm. He grinned at them, and called for an early lunch break.

…

His team arranged themselves in a clearing off the path, spreading out to enjoy the weak winter sun while Ash unpacked the pokechow from his capsule. He was glad his mum had given him the storage box now, he hadn't used it much on his travels so far. He'd kept it stocked for emergencies, but with Brock cooking he hadn't needed it. Now that he was feeding all his pokemon himself, he needed the thirty fold storage! It held enough dried food for about twenty days of full meals for all his pokemon.

He stirred water though the dehydrated mix and sighed. It didn't look nearly as good as Brocks chow. When he put the bowls in front his pokemon they dug in, less enthusiastically than they would have if it was Brocks homemade version. Ash sighed again, annoyed at himself. He wished he knew the secret recipe.

After a few mouthfuls Bulbasaur grunted and backed away from the half eaten bowl of food, sniffing at the air before turning and walking into the bushes.

'Bulbasaur? I know it's not great, but it isn't that bad right?' The grass pokemon called back, beckoning Ash to follow him with a vine. He didn't sound upset… Ash left his sandwich on the ground and followed. Behind him, Squirtle eyed the sandwich for a moment before deciding that it didn't look that tasty, and went back to his chow.

Ash pushed though the bushes following Bulbasaur.

'What's up Bulbasaur?' The pokemon grunted and weaved him further into the bush, stopping before a big dense shrub. The pokemon grunted and waved at the bush. Ash looked between the bush and his pokemon blankly. Bulbasaur sighed and crouched to crawl under the plant, Ash lay down flat on his stomach and squirmed under to follow him. Bulbasaur grunted again, pushing his vines up into the middle of the bush and pulling back with a berry wrapped in his grip.

'Oh! I'm sure they taste better than my pokechow. The outside of the bush must have been picked clean by wild pokemon huh?' Bulbasaur cooed, glad that Ash had understood and together they gathered an armful of the little berries. Wriggling back out from under the bush Ash grinned. He didn't know much about berries, but Bulbasaur obviously did, hopefully they'd make a tasty treat for his team.

Ash stood and gathered the fruit, surprised to see that once they were in the sunlight they turned from the pale yellow that had blended in with the leaves, to a bright blue.

Ash followed the smug Bulbasaur back to camp where the others had already finished their meals. Charizard was snoozing in the sun while Pikachu and Squirtle were rolling around faux wrestling.

Charizard opened one eye, and then rolled to his front when Ash and Bulbasaur broke free of the scrub. Ash swallowed his conditioned caution and walked up to show off their prize. Charizard sniffed at the berries and then snorted a lungful of smoke in Ash's face making him cough and drop the fruits.

The lizard rumbled, laughing as Ash coughed and spluttered, then flapped a wing to clear the smoke. Ash smiled up at Charizard, he still wasn't over the joy of having his friend back.

They shared the berries around, and Ash used his pocket knife to slice a few up and mix them through Bulbasaurs chow. Curious, Ash took a bite making a face at the odd combination of dry and sweet rolling across his tongue. His pokemon all seemed to enjoy it, savouring the berries in little bites.

Ash passed the rest of the berry to Bulbasaur, who chewed it with relish and then dug into his doctored chow. Ash pulled out the map he'd gotten off Professor Oak and frowned over the directions to Valecia Island that had been marked. They'd have to walk to the very end of the peninsular, then get a ferry from the fishing town there, to Cinnabar Island, then somehow get a boat to Valecia. It was going to take them at least a week to get to the coast, and the ferry only left once a week. Ash figured would take at least three weeks total if they travelled straight through.

Well. He guessed that meant they'd have plenty of time to think up a plan of attack. How could he help his pokemon train? They were already tough. Most of the loses they took were because Ash had made a tactical mistake, usually by calling for the wrong move at the wrong time. Or because their opponent had a defence they couldn't power through. What they needed was practice.

Pikachu and Squirtle were squabbling over the last berry and rolled right into him, knocking him, before continuing on. Ash looked at them. Huh. He didn't really need to get into a fight with another trainer did he? His team already had a broad range of the common type match ups. They could all get experience battling each other!

His team was staring at him.

'Oh, did I say that out loud?' They growled, yes.

'Well, what do you think guys?' Charizard scoffed, full of confidence that he could cream any of his team mates. Bulbasaur snapped at him, poking the lizard with a vine, indignant. Charizard snapped back, and the two glared at each other, fire in their eyes.

Ash smiled, a little uncertain.

'If you two want to give it a try then let's do it!' Charizard stomped and Bulbasaur dug his feet into the ground, determined to show the arrogant fire-type what grass-types could do.

Ash, Pikachu and Squirtle cleared the area and stood off to one side, where Ash faltered. Who should he command?

'…since you're at a disadvantage Bulbasaur I'll go with you. Ok?' Bulbasuar gave a roar, and settled into a battle stance.

'We're going to have to be fast and smart. Charizard, Bulbasaur, are you ready?' They roared the affirmative and Ash's smile became a real grin.

'Ok, start!' Charizard immediately launched into the air and fired off a flamethrower.

'Dodge, Bulbasaur! Keep your distance!' Bulbasaur scurried out of the way, and Charizard turned into a dive.

'Use razor leaf!' The storm of leaves splashed across Charizard, not doing very much damage. It clouded his vision enough that Bulbasaur was easily able to doge the swooping strike. Ash wracked his brain for a strategy. Bulbasaur was sturdy, but couldn't take many direct hits from Charizard! But Charizard was just as fast as Bulbasaur. In the air anyway.

'Bulbasaur use your vine whip and ground Charizard!'

Bulbasaur lashed out with his vines, wrapping them around one leg and giving a great heave. Charizard crashed down, hitting some branches on the way and rolled to a stop in the middle of the clearing. Immediately he stood and roared in fury, a bit battered but nowhere near out.

Bulbasaur shouted in triumph, and barely spun out of the way of a flamethrower, wincing from the radiated heat.

'Don't wait Bulbasaur! Use your vines to get close!' Bulbasaur did as he was told and latched on to Charizard and reeled himself in.

'Now, razor leaf!' But Charizard didn't give them a chance, and Bulbasaur pulled right himself into another flamethrower and cried out in pain.

'Bulbasaur!' Ash mentally kicked himself, and Squirtle and Pikachu cried out in worry. Bulbasaur continued to pull himself forward, through the flames, and collided with Chairzards chest and hung there dazed and smoking. Charizard growled and shook himself, but Bulbasuar clung on through his dizziness. Ash shouted, an idea coming to him.

'Swing yourself around onto Charizards back!' Bulbasaur gathered his strength and swung around to hand from Charizards shoulders with a cry of triumph. Now he was out of the line of fire!

Irritated, Charizard launched himself upwards making Bulbasaur cry out in fear.

'Hold on tight Bulbasaur! Use your razor leaf at the back of Charizards head!' Bulbasaur focussed and left loose. This time the attack hurt, hitting a sensitive area at close range and Charizard started to thrash.

Charizard wasn't paying attention to where he was flying, and was surprised to hear Ash call out to them both 'Guys, look out! Charizard stop!' just as he crashed head on into an old growth tree. He took a chunk of the tree out with his shoulder and kept going, slamming into another tree and rolling to a rest at the base of it.

Charizard groaned, Ash came running though the bushes.

'Are you both ok?!' Charizard huffed, annoyed that he'd been taken down by a tree, but not badly hurt. Ash looked around for Bulbasaur but didn't see him.

'Bulbasaur! Where are you buddy?' There was a weak croak from up above their heads. Bulbasaur was hanging upside down, caught in the branches of the tree they'd crashed into.

'Hang on! I'm coming.' Ash leapt for the lowest branch and missed. Charizard moaned, feeling dizzy from the razor leaf, but got to his feet to give Ash a boost up. With his help Ash scrambled upwards, jumping to the taller branches where Bulbasaur was stuck. The grass pokemon gave Ash a sheepish grin, feeling a bit sorry for itself. Ash sighed in relief, and reached up untangling Bulbasuars vines from the tree and helping the pokemon turn around.

'Are you ok?'

'Buulba.' Bulbasur patted Ash with a vine, and winced. Ash reached for Bulbasaur's pokeball and groaned, realising he'd left it with the rest of his gear.

From below them Pikachu called up in worry. Ash waved at his team, and helped Bulbasaur wrap himself around his shoulders like a backpack.

'We're ok, coming down now guys!' They all watched from the base of the tree, ready to catch them if they fell. Ash jumped the last gap, and helped Bulbasur down so he could get a better look at his injuries. That flamethrower had done a lot of damage, but nothing that wouldn't heal. He was just a bit scorched and bruised.

'We'll put some burn heal on this. Charizard how are you doing?' The fire pokemon looked more grumpy than hurt, and huffed before flexing to show he was only bruised. Nothing a rest couldn't handle.

Ash sighed, and then bent to heft Bulbasaur into his arms. Bulbasaur huffed but didn't argue. It hurt to walk with burnt feet.

'Ok, let's get you patched up guys.' His gear was as they left it, and Ash made quick work of spraying Bulbasaur down with the oily heal burn. The pokemon pouted a little but settled down in the shade for a nap, ignoring Squirtle who was poking at him and chattering, half mocking half concerned. Pikachu was having his own fun, squeaking at Charizard and waving his tail back and forth as the dizzy lizard squinted and tried to follow it through his headache.

'What about you Charizard? You took some hits there.' Charizard merely snorted, and held out his bowl. Ash filled it up with water, pouring some for everyone else too. Bulbasaur stirred, gulped his down, and smacked Squirtle away before curling up again.

Ash packed his medicines away securely before flopping down between his two injured pokemon. Well, that hadn't gone as well as he had hoped. It probably hadn't been a good idea to have a mock battle out in the middle of the woods, a good days walk from help. What if one of them had been more seriously hurt?

He started mentally kicking himself. It had been a _stupid_ idea. Yet another blunder from not thinking things through properly.

Sensing his mood change Pikachu scurried over and smacked Ash upside the head with his tail.

'Hey!'

'Pika-pi. Pi pi.' Pikachus tone was stern, and he was immediately backed up by Squirtle in trying not to let Ash sink back into his funk. Bulbasaur wearily opened his eyes, and chimed in with a firm 'bu-bul' before rolling over into the sunlight. The burn heal had already soaked in and done away with the scorching, now it was time to enjoy the sun and recharge. Charizard grumbled and stretched out so his head was lying next to Ash's knee, not quite touching. When the boy didn't move Charizard gave him a nudge and waited. Ash smiled at his pokemon, feeling overfull with love for his team, and started gently stroking the back of Charizards head, mapping the worst of the bruising. It really wasn't that bad.

But they wouldn't be having another mock battle out in the middle of nowhere.

'You both did awesome just then. But I think we'll save the battles until we get closer to a pokemon centre huh?' His team chorused an agreement and Ash settled in to wait while Bulbasaur recharged in the sun. Pikachu hunkered down for a nap, but Squirtle wasn't tired. The water pokemon pouted at his team mates, and Ash grinned at him.

'Not sleepy?'

'Squir-tle!' that was a firm no. Ash got up, careful not to disturb Pikachu or Charizard and went to his bag to see if he had anything they could play with. He emptied it out, and came across a deflated purple and red beach ball. He couldn't remember when he'd picked that up, but Squirtle cheered when he saw it, so Ash quickly blew it up and started a game of volleyball.

They knocked the ball back and forth, and Squirtle quickly got cheeky and started bounding the ball off of the trees to get it going at odd angles and make it hard for Ash who fumbled but managed to hit it back. Squirtle did a little twirl before running and slapping it back so it bounced off the tree behind Ash and then smacked into his head.

'Too easy for you huh buddy?' said Ash, running after the ball. Squirtle cheered and gave a body builder pose.

'Time to give you a handicap I think!' Ash laughed, 'No arms for you!' Squirtle just grinned and made a 'come on' gesture. Ash picked up the ball and threw it above Squirtle, who jumped, twirled, and kicked it back.

They continued on, Squirtle getting more creative as Ash made the throws harder to meet. The game was interrupted by Bulbasaur, who jumped in and head-butted the ball in the middle of a pass, making Ash dive to stop it from touching the ground. He laughed and slapped it towards Bulbasaur only for Squirtle to jump in. Pikachu soon joined in, thumping the ball with his tail. Ash was grinning in the middle of the free for all, his pokemon all making a point of not using their arms but doing their best to make each other miss the ball.

Charizard watched from the sideline with one half lidded eye as the team played. Ash quickly noticed him watching and waved him over, Charizard turned his head to look with both eyes, but stayed where he was. Ash backed out of the game, and hurried over.

'Are you ok Charizard? Are you still dizzy?' Charizard snorted and waved, pretending he just wasn't interested. He flexed his arms as if to say '_I'm too strong to play silly games'_. But Ash wasn't fooled. He could see the longing as Charizard looked at his laughing teammates out of the corner of his eye.

'Hey, don't be like that. Come play.' Charizard grumbled and flexed again. Sending the same message, but this time with a sense of sadness.

Ash imagined Charizard punching the beach ball, his fist going straight through it. He kind of had a point. Ash didn't let that phase him though, just patted Charizard on the arm.

'You'll just have to be really careful won't you? It's not a battle, it's just some fun. Come on.' Charizard let Ash lead him over to the others, hovered awkwardly until Pikachu punted the ball towards him. Automatically he thwacked it with his tail, sending the ball flying over the tree tops. Charizard deflated with a moan, seeming to say '_I told you!'_ But the others didn't get angry, just chuckled, making impressed noises. Squirtle puffed himself up, flexed, and made an imitation of Charizards victory roar. The others giggled, and Ash patted Charizards arm again.

'Don't worry Charizard,' and turned to the others 'you all wait here with the gear, Charizard and I will find the ball.' Pikachu cha-ed and hopped over to sit on top of Ash's bag.

Ash started marching in the direction the ball had flown, keeping his eyes peeled for any flash of purple or red. Charizard followed, footsteps thumping and shaking the ground. They walked for a bit, scanning the tree tops, then Ash smacked his head.

'If it flew over the trees and it isn't heavy. It's probably sitting on top of them. If you fly up you might be able to spot it Charizard.' Charizard growled, prepared for take-off, then looked at Ash with a bit of worry. The trees were dense around here, and while Charizard couldn't hear any right now, there might be some pokemon around that could attack Ash if he left him alone. Coming to the logical solution, Charizard wavered for a moment, then crouched and nodded to his back. Ash's jaw dropped. He knew that Charizard didn't resent him like he used to, but riding him? Charizard looked him straight in the eyes, radiating rediscovered trust and confidence. Ash teared up a little and nodded, and jumped up to give Charizard a hug.

'Thank you.' Charizard huffed, feeling glad no one else was around to see him act all mushy, and urged Ash to climb on. The trainer clambered up, finding a good spot to hang on. Just for fun, Charizard blew upwards in a great show of speed. Ash hollered and clung to Chairzards neck. Charizard laughed and levelled off a good distance above the tree tops. After a moment Ash relaxed and peered over the pokemons shoulder.

_This is amazing_, thought Ash. Below them the whole forest spread out like a detailed map. One that actually made sense for once! He could see the road and used it to orient them in the air. He urged Charizard to dip downwards, and together they quickly spotted the ball resting at the top of a tree.

They weren't the first to spot it. A curious butterfree was hovering around the ball. Charizard snorted, feeling his possessive and territorial nature flare. On his back Ash squashed a pang of nostalgia, thinking about his own Butterfree, before reaching to calm Charizard. As they flew closer the butterfree looked up, panicked, and fled into the trees. Ash hummed. Not nearly as brave as his Butterfree. Charizard swooped to hover and Ash plucked the ball from the leaves.

'Alright buddy, let's get back.'

It was the work of a few wing strokes to get back to the small clearing they had stopped in. His team cheered to see them back with the ball, and as Ash slid to the ground Bulbasaur grabbed it with a vine turning to taunt Pikachu with it.

Ash grinned at them, and ran to intercept the next pass, bouncing it towards Squirtle. Pikachu, being as crafty as he was, immediately turned to Charizard with a plan. The electric type leapt onto Charizard and they took off together, swooping in low to grab the ball. Charizard and Pikachu cawed in triumph, already out of reach of the rest of them Bulbasaur cried out in protest. Then he turned, brimming with determination, and used his vines to launch a screaming Squirtle after them. Ash gaped thinking, _that escalated quickly_, and then cheered as Squirtle oriented himself and used a water gun on the trees below to aim and land on Charizard's back. Bulbasaur yelled, ordering Squirtle to get the ball. Pikachu quickly dodged around his attempted grab and immediately abandoned ship, err, Charizard.

The pokemon curled around the ball as he spun in the air. Pikachu gave a panicked cry, apparently only just realising how high up he was.

'Pikachu!' Ash yelled, and dived to catch the electric mouse, just managing to grab him, and braced to land face down in the dirt. Only to find that Bulbasaur had wrapped his vines around them both. Pikachu quickly shook himself off, and chattered his victory to Bulbasur, who scoffed and stole the ball. He immediately lost it to a swooping Charizard.

Ash just rolled over, flat on his back, and laughed.

…

AN.

Just in case anyone is wondering, they are bulk berries, which are dry and sweet.

I was going to split this chapter but I couldn't find a good midpoint! It just kept going. Hopefully the rest of it will go that way too.


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